Last Friday would have been Buffy’s 9th birthday if she were still alive.

We had her for more than eight years, and in those eight years I was attached to her. I used feel like people think I’m really effing weird when I talk about how she was such an important part of my life, but you know what? I don’t care anymore. When she died, she left a huge whole in my heart that a bratty puppy can’t fill. She loved me, and I loved her.

Buffy didn’t bite my face when I sat down to pet her, or give her a hug. She didn’t steal food off the table, or dirty Kleenex from my trash, or socks from my bedroom. Once she was grown up, she didn’t chew anything that she wasn’t allowed to chew, and she didn’t destroy whatever we gave her. I loved Buffy, and Buffy loved me.

I will always remember how she would carry around her toys so gently, with care, and without ripping them to shreds, or actually sinking her teeth into them. She would hold her manatee, or her hawk, or her purple martin in her mouth like a good lab should, never hurting it.

She left that manatee in my room that last night. She slept on my bed the last night. Even though she was in a huge amount of pain, and could barely walk, let alone get up on the bed herself, she chose my bed to sleep on. I felt terrible for her. I gave her one of the sedatives that the vet told us to give her if she was in a lot of pain or couldn’t sleep, and I dipped it in peanut butter beforehand, like we did with all of her pills. Well, either peanut butter or cheese. Eventually she got smart enough to just eat the cheese off and then spit the pill back out.

One Christmas, Buffy went on a chocolate-eating rampage. Any chocolate we had in the house, accessible or not, Buffy found it, ripped it open, and devoured every last little bit. We were so scared that she was going to die then. Turns out that you dog won’t die unless he/she eats more than 5% of their body weight in chocolate, because of the amount of cocoa. It is, however, addictive to dogs, but still harmful, like cocaine. Buffy went through some withdrawal after, being very naughty and really hyper. I remember that more often than not she would take the wrapper, whole, off the chocolate before eating it, but eventually just ate it all because it was chocolate and because she could.

Buffy would eat anything. Whatever you threw to her, she would catch in her mouth, then either swallow it or spit it out. One time I threw a small rock to her, and she caught it in her mouth then looked offended when it wasn’t edible. She loved carrots as a puppy, and would eat them a lot, but as she got older she became pickier, eating foods that she liked better, often biting the carrots, then spitting it and the bits that came off onto the floor for someone to clean up. Once, when my parents were out of the country for vacation, my nan was over, and had brought Oktoberfest sausages for my brothers and I to have for lunch. These were biiig sausages too. Naturally, I had mine on a bun, with ketchup. As I reached across the counter to get something, sausage and bun in hand, I squeezed a bit too hard and it flew out, right to Buffy. All she did was open her mouth and swallow, then, of course, looked for more. I was dumbfounded. My sausage completely disappeared.

During the last couple of weeks with Buffy we let her do whatever she wanted. If she wanted to go up on the sofa, she could. If she wanted food from the table, she got it. If she wanted to have a bone, she got it too. She didn’t take advantage of all of this, though. She was a great dog, and knew her place, what she could and couldn’t do, and stuck to it the till the end. She did have trouble getting up onto beds, up the stairs, and onto the couch though, because she was so bloated.

Buffy had a heart tumor.

Nobody saw this coming. We have no idea how she got it, but she did. My mom was walking Buffy at one of my brother’s baseball games when she collapsed on the ground, which scared my mom. Buffy was having trouble breathing, too, and my mom knew something was wrong. I was in Florida at the time, so I had no idea that any of this was going on. I found out when I went to the Apple Store with Tonya’s parents, in Florida, and was stealing the WiFi there when I saw my brother had changed his status to something along the lines of “Bad news guys, my dog has a heart tumor and only a couple days to live.” Looking back I’m kind of furious about that. Anyways, I was in a panic about it, my mind reeling and sticking in a state of denial. No, it couldn’t be. I showed Tonya, and she was startled and skeptical about it as well. Then everything started to sync up. My other brother had posted “Shit just happens so fast” on his Facebook, because he’s extremely classy. Tonya’s parents noticed that I wasn’t being loud and obnoxious like I usually am on shopping trips, so they asked if everything was alright. Evidently it wasn’t, and Ton and I told them.

When we got back to the resort, Tonya’s dad let me use his blackberry (and work minutes) to call home and see what was going down. My mom was shocked to hear from me of course, and disappointed that I had to find out that way. They had decided not to tell me until I came back from Florida, which was a couple days after.

Buffy had a heart tumor that had grown so much in size that it had split, releasing fluids originally intended to help heal the split into her abdomen and lower body. Her lungs were being pushed a bit, which explained the trouble breathing after that walk. The fluid, mostly made up of water, sugar, some protein, and a little blood kept seeping further and further down her body, because of the pressure of it. Her abdomen was so full that it eventually moved into her back paws, bloating them, making them look padded. Her chest, outside of her ribcage also filled up with fluid, and you could feel it if you pet her, because of the lab-flab she had there.

Soon she stopped eating so much. She would leave kibble in the bowl and not touch it for a while. She didn’t move around much, if she could help it. She stopped going on walks with anybody except my mom, and wouldn’t even go with me, which shocked me. We could tell she was getting worse and worse, and suspected the end of Buffy’s days were coming.

On the last night, before I gave her the sedative, I curled up with Buffy on the end of my bed, and explained to her, to me, that it was almost time for her to go. I didn’t know until that night that it would be the next morning. I had some time with Buffy. I came to accept the fact that she was going. I came to accept the fact that no matter how hard Buffy fought it, how hard she tried to act like she was okay, she wasn’t going to get better. I accepted it, but I didn’t like it one bit. I didn’t like that even though she wouldn’t be in any more pain, she would be gone forever. I cried with Buffy, on my bed, where she spent so many night and was welcome for every single one of them.

The next day my parents called the vet, who knew about our situation, and they sent some whores in a van who do this for a living. They explained what they were going to do, and we had a little bit with Buffy. My brothers took it harder than I did, because I think I had gotten out everything they needed to get out the night before, when I knew that it was coming soon. We brought Buffy into the living room, where we moved the coffee table and got her to lay down on a blanket with us. The women gave Buffy a heavy sedative, much more powerful and legitimate than the pills we were told to give her. They injected it into her tail, with a tube that they kept in for the next injection, which made her yelp a bit, but we had to hold her down. When she felt the sedative starting to go to work, she tried to stand up, but was too weak because of it, and was trembling just trying to keep standing. I saw this as a sign that it was too early, that she could make it a couple more days. She was in pain though, and I didn’t want her to be in such discomfort any longer. It was a terrible situation.

Then it was time for the bad stuff. They put it in, and I knew it was all over. At this point she couldn’t even keep her head up, and was resting it on my brother’s leg. I was rubbing her back, trying to let her know that everything would be okay, even though we both knew it wouldn’t. Soon the shaking stopped, and I could see Buffy leaving us. Buffy went limp, and was gone.

After, when we were all crying, laying there with what was our dog, I was rubbing the fur on her back, feeling the warmth leave, and the difference between this body and the wonderful dog that had made my life what it was for the last eight years. It was time for Buffy to go. The women carried Buffy out to the truck they came in, and yep, it was official, that was the worst day of my life.

I still miss Buffy, and sincerely wish she could be here right now, healthy and sleeping on my bed, where she spent her last night, and many before that. It took a long time for me to come to terms with the fact that she was indeed gone. Every time I came home to an empty house, I was lonely. Every time I dropped food on the floor, and had to pick it up myself, I was reminded. When I wanted to get out of the house, but couldn’t take the dog for a walk, I remembered. And every time I walked into my room, looked at my bed, and saw a big black something on the bed, my hopes would soar, then the lights would turn on and the hole that had been healing would rip back open again.

This went on for a couple months, and I still miss my dog. We have Max now, but Max is different. He’ll take some getting used to, but will never be the same amazing dog that Buffy was.

Nobody in my household understands my humor. A quote to illustrate my point:

-Graham drops his rubix cube-

Me: “Good one! GOD!”

Graham: “What?”

My mom: “Is everything okay?!”

-Clinton feels discouraged and unappreciated-

Thus ends my feelings of resent.

Tomorrow. To-Effing-Morrow. That’s when Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows has its midnight premiere, which I am attending. I have been listening to the soundtrack for it all day today and yesterday, and my excitement has been growing larger and larger, and becoming more and more fiery. It will so be worth getting < 3 hours of sleep for school on Friday. I can only imagine how crazy I’ll be, let alone how exhausted for work I will be. I’m going with Jimmy, Brynn, and Tonya.

Brynn and I are going to the theatre at around 8:30 to get good spots in line, and we’re dressing up. Tonya and Jimmy have a performance and work respectively, so they shall not be meeting up with us until around 10:00. That’s two whole hours of waiting in line! WOO! Maybe if it’s not packed and we don’t actually have to be there until later we’ll go to Chapters? I don’t even know if that’s where the theater is, I just know that’s where ONE theater is. Eff, I don’t even know if that’s Kitchener. I don’t know Kitchener except for where I used to live as a small child.

Yet again I am supposed to be writing an essay right now. I’m beginning to use blogging as an excellent way to get my brain into the writing mode, and therefore become more productive. SO, expect more blogging. Not only from me, but also from Jess. Jess, I lost that piece of paper with the things you wanted your blog to be. Sorry! Speaking of writing, I have changed my life ambitions, and have decided I want to be a writer and go to school to become a writer. Whether that be an author, an editor, a journalist, or a “professional blogger” is yet to be determined. BUT I want to go to school to be a writer. Or a sociologist. Or a photographer. Fuuuu life decisions.

Now I feel as if I have pumped out enough worddage to effectively write an essay.

This is a dog with a moustache-ball. When I get a puppy, I will buy a ball like this for him, then I will talk to him in a British accent and wear a monocle when he has this in his mouth. Apparently at some point I decided we’re getting a boy puppy, and in my head he’s either a Husky or a German Shepherd. I always see a German Shepherd whenever I walk home from school, and he’s always outside this one house. When I see him, I always feel bad and I want to steal him from the family who clearly isn’t appreciating their awesome dog enough. I want a dog.

Now I’m going to insert something else and write about it. By the way these are all pictures that I have saved on my computer for some reason or another. Actually most of them are there for no reason but they’re awesome so I don’t want to delete them.

Voici l’owl. I forget how to saw owl in French. I just looked it up, it’s ‘hibou.’ I don’t know why I couldn’t remember that, it sounds like an owl noise. Hibou! Hibou! For those of you who are pronouncing the H, don’t. Therrrreee you go. In case you haven’t noticed, this picture is utterly hilarious and I lurve it. I always say it in my announcer voice. Today at work Nico Baba wanted me to do a PA in my announcer voice, but I didn’t because I would probably end up either laughing or running out of breath. I wish I had though. ALSO I just realized that on WLW there are drop shadows around the pictures! WOAH! I wonder if those will show up when I publish this…

Now it’s time to shake it up. And not even shake it up a little, I’m going to shake it up a LOT. That’s right, witchbuhs, it’s video-embedding time. BOOYAH!

Fuh sum reesun, WLW won’t let me make this video private. SO, I’ll have to go into YouTube after I post this and make it so that NOOBUHDY CAN WATCH IT BUHAHAHA! This was filmed in Comm Tech, when I had my laptop. Megan and Taylor and I were bored, and I actually have no recollection of what we were doing/did in this video, so bear with me if it’s lame/boring/not very funny. But it probably will not be because I’m totally hilarious.

Well, that was magnificent. Anyhoo (lol Frat) (he’s my math teacher and says that ALL THE TIME) I have a lot of reading to do (The Kite Runner) and I’m going to go do that and some writing (quote analysis and other fun stuff) because I haven’t done that yet and this doesn’t count (but I like brackets and this is technically writing) so ttyl internets.

1) Leave Tonya’s after hanging out with her, Brynn, and Jimmy.

2) Get home, whine about having a pie ON TOP OF MY EFFING DINNER, then proceed to heat up and eat dinner, followed by pie.

3) Walk around house.

4) Announce that I am going upstairs “to write an essay” and then skip upstairs.

5) Go on 4chan.

6) Get ready for bed.

7) Attempt to do essay, specifically coming up with a title.

8) Draw many things (Pokémon, faces, arms, cats, etc.) to Jimmy on msn, while he tries to do his scholarship essays.

9) Attempt once more to do essay (writing two [count 'em, TWO] sentences.)

10) Decide to blog to see if it will help get my creative writing juices flowing.

I don’t exactly know where these juices are supposed to come from, but apparently those who use creativity a lot secrete them. Perhaps I should kidnap a famous painter or musician and collect all the fluids they ooze, hoping to make myself infinitely creative and unstoppable. Though I doubt that’s legal. Evidently my own creative juices begin their own oozing once I write about something deeper and more profound than “yes.” although pulled out of context, “yes” is somewhat profound.

Yes, they say, as you accept your diploma and step down from the stage, a smile on your face and a fire in your heart.

Yes, they say, as you are admitted to the club, where activity awaits and the scent of alcohol and the sound of bass lure you in.

Yes, they say, as you get up off your knee and take your new fiancé’s hand and connect in a kiss so passionate it resonates.

Yes, they say, as you stand up in utter relief and excitement as you are offered a hand to shake and a job to accept.

That happened to me, kind of. Well, the job-getting part. Good times. I work at Sears now, in electronics. It’s so effing cool. Iron Man 2, Shrek 2, Transformers 2, and Ice Age 3D are always on, along with the Discovery Channel OR The Dog Whisperer, so I don’t get bored when nobody comes in. I’m so happy I got the job.

At this point I start debating whether or not I should actually DO this essay. I just thought about it. Avoiding the essay would be more work than it would be to do the essay RIGHT NOW. I would have to pretend to be sick AGAIN tomorrow, and get my mom to call in, making her suspicious about why I was only sick for first period, then eventually come after first period, then I would have to do it tomorrow night, when I’m tired as hell and possibly working, then I would get docked at least a few marks for it being extra late, if not getting a big fat 0 and contributing to the cause of me not going to get into university!

Basically I’m going to go do it now. Happy Birthday Courtney! I’ll have crusts for you tomorrow!

This happens every day. Perhaps we should run the dishwasher thrice a day.

Take for example, the chair in my bedroom. It was donated to my house by my grandmother, who shall henceforth be referred to as my nan. My nan donated two beige, swiveling chairs in total, both of which were accompanied by a small footstool of the same style as the chairs, which, incidentally, matched.  One of these chairs, I like to think the second of the two, has a large tear in the stubby arm rest. Because of this malformation, it was repaired originally with tape used for packing, which then came undone (I suspect by Graham and Frasier) and was replaced by Duct tape, then moved into the basement. Most often, when something is replaced in my house, it is moved to the basement, where it is usually (ab)used by my brothers, and myself on rare occasion. (See: the four outdated TVs that currently reside there.)

Now, the chair in my bedroom sits companionless in the corner, where I originally intended for it to be a reading chair, while the footstool sits beside my laundry hamper, often used for sweaters or towels. Unfortunately for the supposed reading chair, the lighting in that corner is sparse, with my two lamps being located on my desk, and the opposite site of my bed. In addition, the chair has lost most of its reclining and swiveling abilities due to the fact that it is located in the corner, and would have to be moved out of the triangular trap to be of any use. Call me crazy, but for some reason whenever I see it there, thoughtfully holding a blanket and extra pillow off the floor, I feel guilty for not using it. Not guilt towards my nan because she donated it, but guilt towards the chair itself, and its trusty sidekick, the footstool, because I don’t regularly use it for its “life purpose.”

I feel as though all things should be used regularly for what they were intended, or else they were possibly a waste of money, which is one of the last things I want an object to…feel. Okay, now I know I’m crazy. Is the personification of regular, everyday objects such as chairs and footstools normal? I think I heard that was a symptom of OCD or something, but I can’t remember. It probably isn’t. Actually, I’m pretty sure it’s a symptom of BSC. Bat-Shit Crazy, for those of you who can’t make up useless little acronyms for yourselves, or understand mine for that matter.

Inspiration for this blog: I’ve just powered through half of The Year of Secret Assignments by Jaclyn Moriarty and I’m feeling quite inspired to write, such as I feel when I read fan fiction or other such stories. Also, I was rather perturbed by the return and pestering of my father from work, and could not stand to be on the same floor as him any longer. So, after he made some sarcastic remark about how God forbid I talk to my own father, I gathered my iPod, cell phone, and book to venture upstairs to the sanctity of my own bedroom. I do quite like my bedroom.

It starts next week, on the 7th and I’m not exactly looking forward to it, but I’m not reluctant to go back. I mean, my first semester isn’t my easy one, and I haven’t really done anything exceptionally productive (besides help start writing a play) all summer so it will feel good to get a routine again and to have something to do that requires thinking.

Because I’ve done this in previous years, I’ll do it again now. Here’s my schedule:

Semester 1: Psychology, Advanced Functions, English, Lunch, Comm Tech.

Semester 2: Religion, Writer’s Craft, Drama, Lunch, Spare.

That’s right, I can go home at noon second semester. Or to work. Then I would be able to get lots of monies for things like, oh, school, life away from home, school, food, school, Apple products, school, etc. Or I could go out for an extended lunch with Nico! Or just go home and sleep. Wow, I’m not a very interesting person. I’m going to LOVE having that spare though, because it will mean I’ll have tons of time to do other things to prepare for moving out and whatnot, because I definitely plan on gtfoing when I go off to university.

I don’t feel like continuing that train of thought. Also it is an hour later, so I kinda lost it. Now I am thinking about how I don’t update this site enough, and that includes the layout, and content, not just blogging. I figure if I want to get into web design (maybe, I dunno. Probably not.) then I need to stay on top of things on my OWN website. So I think I’ll start making myself a new layout! I have a couple in store, so I’ll probably just edit those and fix them up, but there is the slight chance that I will make a brand new one as soon as I get inspiration. Then it too will go into my store of layouts. I don’t want to have a completely exhausted supply of layouts though, because what if I spontaneously need to use one for an extra site or something? Or what if this one fails? What if my site fails all together? Now I’m paranoid, cause I’ve been hacked before. Luckily, I’ve changed my password to something that gets 100/100 on those fun password ranking things, so I don’t think I’ll be in much danger. I’m still gonna back up everything after I post this though.

So we’ve been writing a play for the Ontario Sears Drama Festival this year. And by “writing” I mean we’ve been trying to work out a solid storyline since the beginning of August, and we’ve hit a bit of a speedbump. You see, one of our resident drama teachers, Captain Effer as he shall henceforth be named, says that he has “claimed” Sears for himself and that he is using his grad 11/12 class to write a script for sears and then enter them in the competition, replacing those who don’t want to continue. He also told us that as a new rule, if one school is submitting more than one play, they have to share the allotted 50 minutes that is now for each school, not each play. Personally, I don’t believe this rule. I think he’s totally BSing us in an attempt to get us to take his drama class to be in the supposed only Sears play this year, even though those who didn’t take drama did so for good reason, and those of us writing who did take drama are in other classes. By ‘those of us’ I mean me, because only Ton and I took drama, and she’s dropping it. Basically, he wants to use Sears as a bribe to get people to take his course, so that he doesn’t have to teach grade 10 applied English. He actually told this to either Courtney or Emily (who might get a blog soon.) Also, at this point he’s not allowing grade 9 or 10 students to be a part of his play, because they can’t be in a grade 11/12 class. Honestly, his efforts are futile. Firstly because we’ve talked to all of the drama kids about being a part of our play, which we’ve been planning to have since the begging of summer, and secondly because using Sears as a carrot is not going to get the other non-drama kid donkeys in the school to budge, let alone take his stupid course. He’s not even a good teacher, and doesn’t even like me. Granted, I don’t like him either, but that’s mainly because he doesn’t like me, and gave me a fucking 89 or something in his class last year. I’m actually really glad I got the other drama teacher. SO, we’ve talked to the head of arts, the Sears grandmaster, and the teacher we’re getting to supervise our play and we’re just waiting now.

Epic drama in the drama department.

Anyways, I’ve probably ranted enough for one night, and I’m now going to read some more of Dead and Gone.

That’s a lot of stuff I will either a) not get at all or b) have to wait a while for. Like a long while.

But hey, I’m willing to wait for SOME stuff. And I think I’m willing to work for it. If Lady Harlock read this she would kill me for not having any work ethic. Luckily, I have hidden my extreme laziness from her thus far. Cass, this is one of many reasons why we cannot be wed.

Anywho, I’m pulling a Jimmy and switching my goals for university again. But only kinda because I wanted to take biology in the first place but ended up not switching at all because it would have messed up my entire schedule in grade eleven. I regret not taking it now, and I am not exactly looking forward to taking it with a bunch of grade 11′s. Mrs.Menjolian, my guidance counsellor, is going to kill me. BUT, a Slytherin’s gotta do what a Slytherin’s gotta do. Even if that means taking bio twice in one year to take it in university. I don’t even know if I have to take it next year, because SOMEBODY kept turning out the light when I was trying to read Jimmy’s miniature library of  university books/brochures/magazines to figure out if I actually need it to take a specific course. I should really do some research on where I want to go to school to train for the rest of my effing life for myself sometime soon, and NOT at 2 in the morning after a night of no sleep and a day of constant rain. Like now.

I should also be working on my resume and cover letter for places I want to apply at right now, because I need an effing job and places such as Starbucks and Zehrs and Henry’s (maybe) are hiring, and I am supposedly “hireable.” Not ranting about that though. Or the fact that I have had the worst summer in my life, ever. No jokes.

Now we’re going to play LOOK AT MY WoW PHOTOGRAPHY!!!!111 Because I like taking screenshots of WoW sometimes. Also my camera broke (see: worst summer ever.)

Yes, I know, I’m a huge nerd, but now you know what I do in my spare time! Wow, I need a life. And a job. And money for education.
Kay bye.

Day 1 – Driving. Day 2 – More Driving. Day 3 – Driving / Resort Arrival. Day 4 – Visiting Family. Day 5 – Universal. Day 6 – Universal. Day 7 – Resort / Shopping. Day 8 – Universal. Day 9 – Bad News. Day 10 – Driving.

Day 1 – Driving

On the first day, I packed in the morning, and went on Skype with Tonya to compare suitcase sizes with her so that I could judge how much to pack, because we drove down. Then I went to Shoppers Drug Mart to pick up some Breathe Right strips so that I don’t snore so much. Then I went over to Chez Ton, and helped then get ready a bit, and played with Zorro and stuff. Then we finally left around, like, 4:15 ish, and drove until supper time, when we stopped at a cool restaurant that had WiFi so I tweeted there! We had Denny’s, cause that’s Tonya’s FAVOURITE American restaurant. Then it was more driving, and eventually we stopped at a Days Inn, which also had WiFi and horrific decor.

Day 2 – Driving

Right after breakfast (which was crappy) we hit the road again and drove ALLL DAY, stopping for Subway at lunch. Sometime after lunch, Tonya and I were listening to my iPod on the car speakers, and lip syncing Fire from Glee. We filmed some of it, it’s really funny.

When we stopped, it was for supper, AND to find a hotel to stay in. We picked a Comfort Inn, which also had WiFi, and then drove around for a bit trying to find a respectable restaurant to eat at. Tonya spotted a Pizza Hut. L-Diz, D-Dawg, and I didn’t though, so we went around the block again, and L-Diz and D-Dawg still didn’t see it. But, that time, Ton and I saw that it was actually a KFC/Pizza Hut, so we went around one more time and finally pulled in. When we went into this restaurant hybrid, we saw the menu. KFC/Pizza Hut my ass. They had about 40 different types of chicken meals, then 4 types of Pizza combos. Just four. Like, a small, plate-sized pizza, and a drink, but four different types of pizza. That’s it. When we went to order, this 4′ tall black girl comes up with the expression on her face that one would wear while getting told off by their parents. She was a serious sour-puss. She did not smile once, and then she told us that there wasn’t any chicken. “Well, there is but it’s frozen.” Thanks, witchbuh. Then L-Diz decided that KFC was too greasy and declared that she couldn’t eat there, so she and D-Dawg went to Wendy’s, while Ton and I waited and watched the old lady in pajamas, the extremely fat guy in a wife beater that was so baggy you could see his boobs, and the other randoms that came in just to use the washroom. After that, we walked back to the hotel, ate, pretented we were honeymooners, uploaded our fun video and then had a video call with Jimz.

Day 3 – Driving / Resort

Got up, had breakfast (WAFFLES!) and started driving. Once we got to Orlando, there was a huuuugggee accident a long ways up the freeway, and we were going really really slowly for like an hour, and got to the resort super late. But oh my god, the resort is so nice. This picture is a view from our windows and balcony, which Tonya took. Almost immediately we went swimming in that gigantic pool. There was another section to it too, it was basically three pools all attached. The only thing is that the deepest point is 5 feet, but oh well. Then D-Dawg went to go get Kaylea from the airport, and was reaalllyyy late coming back. While we were waiting for them, L-Diz started getting all paranoid and was freaking out, and not even the fireworks we could see in the distance from the balcony could cheer her up; she didn’t scream or clap! Eventually they came home, L-Diz calmed down and we all went to Wal-Mart! It was effing PACKED, at 11:30 at night! It was ridiculous!

Day 4 – Visiting Family

This was our first stay-at-home day with everyone. We sat around the pool most of the day, and then went to Tonya’s mom’s cousins house! They have a really nice house, and a pool, and a turtle, and a lots of little lizards running around that can be caught and placed on hands, laps, heads, boobs, etc. Those were fun to play with, and when we put them in the pool they swam around! It was fun, but we wanted to actually swim (except Tonya. “MYY HAAAAAIIIRRRR”) so we had to let them go. After swimming we all went out for Ethiopian food, which I REALLY liked, because Tonya’s ‘aunt’ is from Ethiopia. Apparently they’re like the USA of Africa, what with the nationalism and bullying and stuff. Didn’t know that! Anyways, after supper, we all went to Tonya’s ‘cousin’s’ (haha apostrophes) favourite ice cream place, called Froyos. It was reaaalllyy nice. Like, two huge super-thin plasma screens on the walls, and nice lighting and stuff. The washroom door was probably one of the most fascinating things though. It was so cool. At first glance it looks like a regular door with just glass on it, which is kinda weird at first glance for a washroom door, and I kinda just assumed it was like a one-way thing going on when Tonya showed me, having gone to use it minutes before. But when you close it and lock the door, WHAM, the entire glass goes pretty much opaque. It’s so frickin’ cool. D-Dawg said it was like the new 3D glasses, or an LCD shutter or something like that, I don’t really know But after that we went back to their house and Tonya felt sick so we went back to the hotel after mooching off their WiFi, Skyping my parents, and emailing people for a bit afterwards. Also, Kaylea and Tonya got their hair braided by their ‘aunt’ but only Kaylea’s stayed in cause Ton’s hair is short.

Day 5 – Universal

Our fifth day was finally the day. Universal Studios, and more importantly, the Wizarding World of Harry Potter. And holy balls, it was hot. Within the first half an hour of getting there, we marched straight to and explored Hogsmeade (which is at the frickin’ back of the entire park) going faster whenever we saw a sign with Harry’s face on it. After looking around the outside of the Hogsmeade shops for a while (it was effing PACKED) we got in the giant and slow-moving line for Olivanders. Fifteen minutes into this huge line, we had gone through two water bottles, and Kaylea fainted. That’s right, hardcore FAINTED. It got so hot, apparently she was kinda dehydrated, and there was almost no shade for us, so fainting seemed like a good idea to Kaylea’s body. Luckily the people in front of and behind us had those fun fans with the spray-things built in, so they sprayed / fanned her for a bit, and I got ice which we placed in between her braids from the day before, and rubbed on her face and stuff. Her lips wen totally white, along with her face, and she slumped against the wall of Spintwitches Sporting Goods. When we tried to get her to sip some more water, her arms kinda fell down and she didn’t take in any water. The people in front of us gave Tonya the “Hey, your sister just effing fainted” look, and she immediately started tapping her face and yelling “OOookay! Wakey wakey! Let’s go!” and Kaylea eventually got back up. Then we went into Ollivanders and it was air-conditioned and there were wands everywhere. Oh, and I got a picture with Ollivander After that I bought wands, while Tonya and Kaylea got ones for themselves. Tonya’s is sweeeet, it’s her birth-month wand too. After the whole frightening fainting fiasco, Kaylea sat at the Owl Post, bought a quill, and sent some postcards to her friends, while Tonya and I went on the Forbidden Journey. It. Was. AWESOME. Not just because of the quick line, the fact that we got to go THROUGH HOGWARTS (yes, I have pictures) or the fact that the portraits that moved looked like legit portraits, but because the ride itself was absolutely fantastic. I don’t want to ruin anything, but it’s definitely not like your convential roller coster. It’s amazing. We also ate at the Three Broomsticks, where we tasted Butterbeer, and played with our wandz. We went on the Dragon Challenge after that, riding both roller costers, once in the front row (amazing) and then went back to the resort. Natually, an immediate swim was necessary when we got back. Then we went to Wal Mart again! While we were there we got one of those fan spray bottles for like $7. It was sweet.

Day 6 – Universal

Back to Universal again, but this time we wanted to go in the morning instead of going in the afternoon and then staying till 10:00 when the park closed. But being lazy teenagers, we got up at like noon and went then, instead of when the park opened. In our attempts to get out of the parking lot, when D-Dawg was about to start going forward after his reverse from the spot, some bitch from Louisiana with a sword strapped to the back of her car decided it would be a good idea to back out right then. Fortunately for us, we had the ever-alert Kaylea in the car, who screamed “HEY!! …… WE’RE GONNA GET HIT!!” thinking at first that the bitch from Louisiana could hear us. Also fortunately, she only hit the bumper, and with her sword, didn’t do much damage past a big dent/puncture in the bumper. The “trailer hitch” that I bet once severed heads in Japan was unscathed, of course. They exchanged info and Kaylea and Tonya and I found some luggage carts to sit on and then a baby fell in lust with me but I was all “uh-uh my woma’s right here lady” so she left. We got there at about the same time we did the day before, and surprisingly enough there wasn’t a huge line to get into the Wizarding World itself like the lady at the gate said there would be. The first thing we did was go to Honeydukes and Zonkos to get candy and Kaylea got a t-shirt. I bought some Bertie Bott’s Every-Flavour Beans (they mean every flavour) and Tonya got an Acid Pop, Every-Flavour Beans, and a Pumpkin Juice. Kaylea got Every-Flavour Beans, some Horehound candies in a jar, and a Pumpkin Pastie, which she and Tonya ate. I do not like pumkin foods. Then we went back to the Forbidden Journey, this time bringing Kaylea with us and looking at the picture they take mid-ride. Then we went back to Dervish and Banges, where I bought my wonderful wand and some Slytherin robes They look SO GOOD and I love them. I’m pretty sure they will be my new thing to wear for the next couple of weeks. Then it was lunch at the Three Broomsticks again, it was really yummy. I got a normal Butterbeer this time, instead of a frozen, slushee-esque one. When we had finished that we went back up the Dragon Challenge to take pictures of Hagrid’s hut / the Ford Anglia / Hogwarts and then got in line for the Flight of the Hippogriff. It was an okay ride, not really a huge thrill-ride, but it was still fun, and there was a huge nest with Buckbeak in it! By that time it was almost time to leave, so we decided to start walking towards the exit. On our way there, we passed the Hulk ride, and the wait time for that was really short, so we hopped on. It was SO COOL. It was an awesome roller coster, and it goes under a bridge and through some mist at one point, it was so much fun. By that time D-Dawg had arrived and we went back to the Resort.

Day 7 – Shopping

This day we decided to stay home, because we were super tired from all of the walking, and were pretty low on adrenaline. Anyways, Tonya, Kaylea, L-Diz and I went shopping. That was a mistake on my behalf. I was basically towed around this mall that was kindof outdoors and therefore didn’t have air conditioning (except in the stores) so it was kindof hell. BUT when Tonya was trying on dresses, and Kaylea had bought her sweat pants, she and I stepped outside the door to wander/look at a piercing rack. While we were doing that, some guys walked by us while they were talking and stuff. Kaylea was bent over at the waist, looking at the spacers on the counter thing. Anyways, her booty was sticking out, and right as the one guy walked by, he spotted it, stopped mid-sentence and mid-stride, stared for a good three seconds at her ass, and then continued walking. It was absolutely hilarious. After that we went into the dress store again and reenacted it for L-Diz, Tonya, and the two girls working there, who all laughed hysterically. After that we made our way to the other side of the mall, where L-Diz was trying on shoes. When we were approaching the store we wished to enter, just as I had had enough and was lying on the ground moaning, some rando Russian lady came up to us and started trying to sell Kaylea and Tonya soaps and stuff that they already had. She was really nice though, so we couldn’t be like “F U NO” and leave, so after she yelled to ‘Keelee’ to try this stuff, we went in the store and they bought shoes. Then L-Diz left cause she didn’t know we were in there too. Eventually we went back to the resort and loled for a bit, then went in the pool, la-di-da.

Day 8 – Universal

Day 8 was when Tonya and I went to Universal by ourselves at around noon, cause Kaylea wanted to buy a dress for her bf’s sister’s wedding or something. So she was not there to make us a bit late, and therefore we got there during peak hours. Oh, my, god. We also forgot the effing fan, so it was hot as hell and we almost died. When we got there, there was a line just to get into the Harry Potter part. It was that packed. Not even into one of the stores, just into the area. So we avoided that part for a little bit, and decided to try and go on one of the water rides, because we were already sweating buckets. That line was 2 hours, and it stopped because something fucking broke or who knows what and there was going to be a huge delay so we gtfo’d via the express pass lane. Then we went to the Spiderman ride, which had a wait time totaling at about 3 hours. That was mainly due to the sheer number of Brazilian kids going on it all at once, and because there was AN EFFING PIZZA STAND NEAR THE BEGINNING OF THE LINE. YEAH. IN LINE. LIKE, YOU STOP THE ENTIRE F*ING LINEUP TO GET PIZZA, WHICH YOU HAD TO WAIT FOR. And because allllll the Brazilian kids wanted pizza, and allll of them were together in a huge effing group, we had to wait a LOT. Eventually there was a medium-sized group of Brazilians in front of a Mehican family, and then Tonya and I. When the Brazilians stopped for pizza, the Mehicans passed alllll the pizza-purchasing Brazilian kids, so Ton and I followed suit, with much loud swearing on our behalf. I was not a happy camper. The ride from that point on was slow and stupid and dirty, but the ride was okay. Eventually we got into HP and dodged an entire line for the Forbidden Journey by going to Filch’s Emporium. We got past about 200 people, and the line was fast When we got back, we went in the pool, and then on a helicopter ride! When Tonya found out that it was 2-3 minutes long, she yelled “WELL THAT’S SHITTY” in the middle of the booking office and everyone looked at her and one of the employees agreed and it was hilarious. But Kaylea and D-Dawg went all the way to Universal and back which made Tonya a poo-poo-butt and she didn’t cheer up.

Day 9 – Bad News

On the morning of Day 9 Kaylea hopped on a plane and went back to the homeland, while the rest of us remained to enjoy our last day of vacation and lounge around in the pool. We explored the other pool too, which was kinda cool, and then went out for supper, to get Japanese food at a restaurant near the resort. The Japanese food was quite yummy, and after we had finished we walked back to the resort and then hopped in the car to go to the Florida Mall, which had an Apple Store! … and a Pandora store, which L-Diz RAN to when she saw it. Like, full-out BOOKED it, in the doors and across the hall to the Pandroa store. She then bought 2 beads and one for Kaylea. I got Tonya a dinosaur one. Then we went to the Apple Store. Shopping trip complete, for me anyways. I drooled over some Sexintosh computers for a while, then we walked across the hall for another shoe store. I was still stealing the WiFi from the Apple Store on my iPod when I found out the bad news. My brother Graham had put it in his MSN status, which my parents later made him delete, but I saw it nonetheless. It said that my dog, Buffy, has a heart tumor, and only has a couple days to live. That alarmed me greatly. I emailed my mom, which she didn’t respond to right away, and then thinking back on the stuff I had seen earlier, with Graham’s display picture being one of Buffy, and Frasier’s status a depressing one, I pretty much found out that it was not a bad joke. When we got back, D-Dawg let me use his phone to call my rents, to find out that yes, Buffy does have a heart tumor and only has a couple days to live. By this point I was sobbing and couldn’t really talk much, so my mom told me Buffy was acting fine, and that we really don’t know how long she has. I’m so, so glad I had Tonya there. I don’t know what I would have done. She cheered me up as much as one could, and eventually we went to sleep.

Day 10/11 – Driving Home

The next day we left, and I was really anxious to, because what if I didn’t get to see my dog again? I didn’t say anything though. We stopped at 2 Bob Evans-es, and I used my iPod to find directions and a phone number to a nearby hotel that we stayed in, because all the other ones around where we stopped were booked. The room we stayed in was smoking, and you could hear a little rat-sized dog barking its ass off in a room near us, so needless to say that was not the best sleep any of us got. They had free WiFi though, which the resort didn’t, so I took advantage of that. The next day we stopped at another Bob Evans, and a grocery store, where Ton’s parents got 3 boxes of Siera Mist, which you can’t buy in Canada. Then we hit the road again, and stopped to get slushies and pee. Then we crossed the border, and I got home to my puppy, who is still alive right now, and is lying on my bed.

So that was my vacation, and I’m sorry this was way overdue! Also sorry about the length, the word count is like 3434!

I got a tan! Holy crap! Just on my face and arms and shoulders and back though, as Tonya put it “Your chest and thighs are still pasty white!” and then proceeded to call me a milk kid. It’s okay, Kaylea, her sister, was milk too. I’M NOT ALONE.

Milk kids, hollaback.